O, Aquaman. You who are the master of the Seven Seas. All hail Aquaman! You who rule beneath the waves and bring peace to the ocean’s creatures. Huzzah for Aquaman, champion of the deep!

Oh, who am I kidding? It’s hard to get excited about Aquaman. A superhero who lives underwater? How much crime can there be in the ocean? It’s not like Lex Luthor is going to rob an underwater bank. Or the Joker is going to break into the underwater Fort Knox. Let’s face it. The big stuff happens on dry land. Sure, Aquaman is handy to have around if you’re trapped in a giant clam or if a shrimp gets in trouble. But as far as super-heroics are concerned, the water is not where the action is.

Aquaman is the Rodney Dangerfield of super heroes. He gets no respect. While Superman is going back in time to rescue Cleopatra, Aquaman is making sure that fish stay in school. While Batman is defending Earth from an invasion of space aliens, Aquaman is checking on the coral to make sure everything is hunky dory. It is. The coral is just fine. Thanks, Aquaman. Nice job.

It’s not easy being the Sea King. Even with the Aqualad and Aquababy around to keep him company, Aquaman gets bored. Sure, he can talk to fish. But what do they have to talk about, really? “Say, I saw some plankton over there!” “Gee, thanks for the tip, Aquaman!”

There is one who understands. I’m talking about Grandpa Griffith. He knows how tough it is to be the only member of the Justice League of America who spends most of his time soaking wet.

To hear this soggy song of sympathy, click the link below:

Aquaman - Grandpa Griffith